Two people about to marry.
One person can begin alone. Invite the other when you are ready. Chapter 1 is free, in full.
How the two of you work.
Answer separately
Each of you answers on your own first. Neither side opens until both have finished the chapter.
Talk together
Then you sit down and talk. The app sets the agenda for that evening, then leaves.
In order, one subject at a time.
- 01Money, and how you’ll decideWho earns, who decides, and what you owe.
- 02Family, and the two of youTwo families, one household, clear lines.
- 03Conflict, and how you repairHow you argue, and how you repair.
- 04Careers, and whose movesAmbition, moves, and whose turn it is.
- 05The home you’ll keepWhere you live, and what you keep.
- 06Friendships and time apartTime together, and time apart.
- 07Intimacy and closenessCloseness, honestly and without a script.
- 08Children, and the question of themThe question of them, asked plainly.
- 09Faith, ritual and the everydayBelief, ritual, and the everyday.
- 10The first year, rehearsedRehearsed before you live it.
Ten lines, written by the two of you.
7 of ten written
Before the vows
Chapter one
Chapter one is free
chapter one Money, and how you’ll decide
your money rule
Our money lives in one pot, and each of us keeps a corner no one has to explain.
Example line · illustration Before the vows
Chapter two
Chapter two of ten
chapter two Family, and the two of you
your united front
We answer our families together, or not at all.
The line the two of you kept Before the vows
Chapter three
Chapter three of ten
chapter three Conflict, and how you repair
your repair plan
We will not use silence as a weapon.
The line the two of you kept Before the vows
Chapter four
Chapter four of ten
chapter four Careers, and whose moves
the next move, mapped
Whoever moves for work, the other one chooses the city after.
The line the two of you kept Before the vows
Chapter five
Chapter five of ten
chapter five The home you’ll keep
who does what, agreed
Whoever cooks does not wash up. This is not negotiable.
The line the two of you kept Before the vows
Chapter six
Chapter six of ten
chapter six Friendships and time apart
time that stays yours
One evening a week is ours. One belongs to neither of us.
The line the two of you kept Before the vows
Chapter seven
Chapter seven of ten
chapter seven Intimacy and closeness
at your own depth
We say it plainly, or we say that we cannot yet.
The line the two of you kept Before the vows
Chapter eight
Chapter eight of ten
chapter eight Children, and the question of them
whether, and when
Chapter eight is still ahead of you Before the vows
Chapter nine
Chapter nine of ten
chapter nine Faith, ritual and the everyday
one ritual of your own
Chapter nine is still ahead of you Before the vows
Chapter ten
Chapter ten of ten
chapter ten The first year, rehearsed
your ten lines
Chapter ten is still ahead of you
Take the top one off
Questions.
Is this a test of our relationship?
What if our answers don’t match?
My partner didn’t choose this. Will it feel like homework?
What does it cost?
Begin withchapter one.It’s free.
Who sees what you write, what stays private
What each chapter asks, the questions to ask before you marry
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